4 COUNTRIES, ONE WEEK AND A HALF

I’ve had some busy weeks!!! I actually have the feeling that I haven’t seeped for a looong time. Anyways my friends Claudia and Mário were here on a short visit, discovering old Brussels, Amsterdam and Brussels airport. Yes, Brussels Airport. Here go some highlights of those, and other filled days from last week:

Tuesday 4th September:
-Get off work, in a hurry to go to supermarket (my friends coming in the next day), and to get Ana Catarino who is arriving to Brussels Airport from Bulgarian holiday. Get into a major traffic jam, stress a lot, get out of traffic jam go to Delhaize in a rush and get to the airport just on time. Go home, go to the laundry, vacuum the house, clean until 3 morning, sleep 4 hours.

Wednesday, 5th September
-Go to work and stress, get off work, no traffic jam, pick my friends up in the airport, take them to Grand Place. "UH", "AH", and after that we drag our tired bottoms to a cheesy Pita Shoarma. Sleep 5 hours.
Thursday 6th September
-Drag myself to Lille, France and come back home later in the day. My friends went to Antwerp. Cook Burritos for my friends. Invited all my friends no one else shows up lol. Curse them all and make voodoo dolls of all my friends who didn’t show up- Burritos are actually quite good, and light up all the candles. Burrito’s candle light dinner. We discuss Antwerp, "UH", "AH", and Belgian (lack of) national unity. Sleep 4 hours.

Friday 7th September
-House smells of Burrito. Go to work. Leave work early. Walk around in Brussels. "UH", "AH". 15km. Muscle pain. Go home and get dinner from Place Jordan. Famous fries and meat. Go to Old oak for drink. Get back home comatose state. Sleep 4 hours.
Saturday 8th September
-House smells of Burrito and fries. Wake up semi-comatose at 6 morning to take friend to the airport. Get back home. Go to Amsterdam. Pay for the most expensive parking in the world. Walk around in Amsterdam. 10km. Muscle pain. Go to Red Light District. Consider a career change after. Go back to Brussels. Friends receive bad news gonna have to go home earlier. Go running 9km to Parc Cinquentenaire. Make dinner, pasta something. Lit up candles. Eat dinner in five minutes. Go to watch Portugal Poland. 2-2 and depression, and swearing. Change voodoo dolls into Poland team. Go pick up Xana and André in the airport, just coming back from popular destination Bulgaria. Take friends home and go to party until 5 AM. Get back home comatose state.
Sunday 9th September
-House smells of Burritos, pesto and fries. Friends wake me up and say goodbye, I moan something and back to sleep. Friends go to airport. One of them comes back decides to stay. We decide to sleep a bit more. Friend wakes me up saying she changed her mind. I take her to airport. She pays 300 for a flight. She curses a lot. I offer my voodoo dolls. Go back home. Totally dead!!!!
...

Friday 14th September
-Go to London and buy 110 Pounds boots at Top Shop!!! Shop all day (for work)!!! Officially now a poor and happy woman!!!

Sónia's b-day

Yesterday went to a b-day party, and promised the b-day girl, Sónia, a home made b-day cake. Seemed easy. Achievable. Little did I know.
Ok, here goes yesterday:
-6 PM, 14 minutes-Go to GB (supermarket)
-6 PM, 19 minutes-Stand in the waiting line to pay
-6 PM, 22 minutes-Get to the cashier
-6 PM, 22 minutes and 10 seconds-Realize can’t find bank card
-6 PM, 23 minutes and 51 seconds-Search for bank card intensively in bag
-6 PM, 24 minutes and 3 seconds-Excuse myself to the cashier girl because of not finding card
-6 PM, 24 minutes and 27 seconds-Fell mortified because of not finding card yet
-6 PM, 24 minutes and 33 seconds-Girl looks at me with dead lamb eyes (famous Portuguese expression translating into "I don’t even like my job and I have to put up with stupid costumers"
-6 PM, 25 minutes and 40 seconds-Queue of 50metres start looking at me with disgust
-6 PM, 26 minutes and 12 seconds-Still can’t find my card
-6 PM, 26 minutes and 1 second-Excuse myself again because of not finding card
-6 PM, 26 minutes and 18 seconds-Feel mortified again
-6 PM, 26 minutes and 29 seconds-have brilliant idea to pay with money
-6 PM, 26 minutes and 59 seconds-Search for money intensively seams don’t have enough
-6 PM, 27 minutes and 10 seconds-Girl and queue look at me with disgust
-6 hours, 27 minutes and 42 seconds-Discover miracle coins in the jacket
-6 hours, 27 minutes and 50 seconds-With a mix of relief and shame pay the bill
-6 PM, 27 minutes and 52 seconds-Discover my Bank Card
-6 PM, 28 minutes and 5 seconds-Queue and Girl look at me with disgust
-6 PM 28 minutes and 10 seconds-Excuse myself once more and leave mortified to my place
-6 PM, 36 minutes and 26 seconds-Start doing chocolate cake
-6 PM, 52 minutes and 35 seconds-Put chocolate cake in the oven everything came out perfect
-7 PM, 53 minutes and 54 seconds-Seems cake is already done try to flip it over
-7 PM, 54 minutes and 34 seconds-the shock, the horror, the tragedy. Seems cake is still almost completely raw except for the top layer and breaks into pieces
-7 PM, 59 minutes and 11 seconds-have brilliant idea to mix the already cooked bits with the raw parts with a blender and put it back in the oven
-8 PM, 58 minutes and 41 seconds-Luis and Namita arrive at my place, time to go, take cake still not cooked plus whipped cream that is in the fridge
-10 PM, 14 minutes and 8 seconds-Get to Ana Gama’s place to get Cris
-10 PM, 17 minutes and 23 seconds-leave to Sonia’s house
-10 PM, 17 minutes and 40 seconds-Cris remembers she forgot the wine
-10 PM, 18 minutes and 3 seconds-Cris goes back to get wine
-10 PM, 19 minutes and 56 seconds-leave to Sonia´s house
-10 PM, 22 minutes and 10 seconds-Luis tell us his adventures which are:
-4PM-Pedro tells him he must be at the airport in 20 minutes but must leave his car at VUB (his workplace)
-4PM, 3 minutes-He goes into the building to get stuff to take to Portugal
-4 PM, 7 minutes-He comes back and they realize they left the key inside the closed car
-4 PM, 12 minutes-They break the window because they can not wait
-4 PM, 16 minutes -The security guard calls Pedro saying that someone is stealing his car
-4 PM, 30 minutes -they get to the airport on time

Anyway continuing the evening...
-10 PM, 29 minutes and 14 seconds-We arrive at Sonia’s house they all leave the car I go parking
-10 PM, 32 minutes and 45 seconds-One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 34 minutes and 5 seconds -One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 35 minutes and 55 seconds- One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 38 minutes and 45 seconds- One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 41 minutes and 19 seconds-One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 43 minutes and 20 seconds-One more lap at the block trying to find a parking space
-10 PM, 44 minutes and 16 seconds-A miracle happens, manage to find a parking space, 500 metres away
-10 PM, 44 minutes and 50 seconds-Walk in high heels till Sónia’S house
-10 PM, 50 minutes and 47 seconds-Arrive and excuse myself because of the cake and give her gift
-11 PM, 2 minutes and 21 seconds-When she is opening up gift, books The Art of Being Belgium and Secret Brussels, she mentions she is leaving Belgium in 15 days
-11 PM, 3 minutes and 10 seconds-Feeling a bit of pain in the heart and mention to Sonia, "Ups..."
-11 PM, 4 minutes and 3 seconds-Sónia laughs when opening gifts
-11 PM, 4 minutes and 20 seconds-Feeling mortified
-11 PM, 22 minutes and 10 seconds-take cake out realized it hasn’t grown and it is burned on the edges
-11 PM, 25 minutes and 32 seconds-cut the burned edges
-11 PM, 27 minutes and 8 seconds-Put whipped cream on top
-11 PM, 29 minutes and 54 seconds-Whipped cream melts because cake is hot
-11 PM, 30 minutes and 4 seconds-Put cake in fridge and pray for miracle and a hole in the ground to hide
-11 PM, 43 minutes and 17 seconds- We blow out candle
-11 PM hours, 47 minutes and 10 seconds- People start eating cake
-11 PM, 52 minutes and 43 seconds-Someone at the end of the room points at me saying "she did it" with a funny look in their face
-11 PM, 52 minutes and 45 seconds-I hide behind Rita
-11 PM, 55 minutes and 13 seconds-I try it, tastes like chocolate with chewing gum consistency
-4 AM, 12 minutes and 10 seconds-Get home after leaving friends in different houses all around Parc Cinquentenarie
-4 AM, 23 minutes and 32 seconds-Go to sleep with the feeling of a job well done in embarrassing myself!
And how was your day???

Last minute call!

And the award for the crappiest cell phone pics goes to... tchan tchan... Rita Madruga de Lagoa e Brito!!!! Now I don't know if to kill myself or try to apply to Extreme Makeover.

These were on hollidays in Lisbon. We were drunk. I didn´t see her taking pics. You cow!!!!! I love you, but I´ll kill you when I see you blooooood spiled all over!!!

Turquey a la Wok anyone???

I know, I know. Haven’t been writing all that much in my blog. Guess I need a camera to make things more exciting (sigh).
Anyways yesterday had fantastic dinner at my house, chill out mood, candles all over the place, international crowd, exotic wannabe Chinese/Indian dish, more Portuguese/bullshit in the making, and what can I say it was the perfect melange for a perfect night.
Good conversation, mostly dishing about Brussels and Belgium, or lack of it, with a comic relief brought by stupid accent imitations. Any one can guess who was the biggest accent impersonator? Anyone??
No brownie, no sleep afterwards at least felt like no sleep when I had to get up to go to work, and a great feeling that my friends in Euroland are a finding, my family in all the dark, drunk, cheerful and stupid moments. I know, I know, getting a bit emotional here.
Next dinner I promise I will have a camera to take pics.
And by the way I got a super-duper present!!! In fact I have been dreaming about that for a long time!!! A Mercedes? Prada shoes? A desert island? A boyfriend??? No it was an onion cutterJ. I loved it, loved it loveeeed it. No longer will my hands possess the fowl smell of onions after organizing dinners chez moi! So thank you xuxu Rosa and João!!! And thank you, Fili, Pedros from Azores, Namita, Rita and Testosterone man AKA Luís for coming. Love you all, sniff, sniff (feeling very mushy mushy today-must be almost that time of the month).
Ain´t life grand when you can feel the happiness through little things like not smelling bad!
On a more serious subject Time magazine cover of last week focus on the faith crisis experienced by mother Teresa during her life, even though she’s like the biggest nun in history!!! It seems she hid it well and only after her death these letters were she spoke about it are being published. It’s like, you know, like, major shock in the world. “I call, I cling, I want-and there is no One to answer […]there is such convicting emptiness that those very thoughts return like sharp knifes &hurt my very soul […]” Dayummmmmmm if Mother Teresa feels like this imagine the rest of us!!! In her letters she speaks of God as if almost he deserted her, asking why did he not love her back. I guess they didn’t have Oprah back then eih? He’s just not into you!!! Ok, God lightning coming upon me at any second now…
While I’m still alive would like to mention that currently very happy because Benfica, the biggest club in the world (literally) is in zzzze championzzz leaguezz. Yuhuuuu!
Did I mention that I ran/dragged myself 8,5kms last Wednesday??? At this rate I will be able to run to Lisbon every weekend instead of taking a plane. It would be cheaper. And maybe I would loose those 3 kgs that I’ve been aiming to loose for a while.
Tomorrow Izz gozz shopingue!!!! Oh joy of beginning of month…

VOLLO FARE EL AMORE CON CONTROL

Yuhuuuuu its official, I’m starting my Italian lessons in September!! And more I managed to get into the 2nd level without ever making the first haha. I guess being Portuguese has to have an advantage somewhere…

What can I say I am good with languages, and also love to brag about it, as everyone close to me knows, and I so do love to that I went to the reception to sign up, was ecstatic after the test, felt the adrenalin pumping in my veins so much, that I decided to go for it. Take the risk. Feel the danger. As if the danger was alien’s breath on my face. Just risk everything.

I decided… to…. Talk to the receptionist… in… effing Dutch!!! I felt daring that day. Everything was going fine till the moment I didn’t understand a word, and then she started speaking to me in French, but I was like, come on, like I’m not gonna give up (this one is for you Bruno). So I kept talking to her in Dutch, she bended to my extraordinary will and gave up and kept it in Dutch. All was going fine till the moment I said “Ik will parkeren mein auto ook” (I want to park my car here too). All she had to say was “30 euros, please".

But no. She had to take a piss at me. She just started rambling really fast “ blablabla,3rd week of September, blablabla, not fast, slowly with the car, blablabla, ok?” and I go like “ok”. So now I have no parking bagde. Good.

In another topic this will be a football filled weekend and I can’t begin to express my joy that Fernando Santos was fired and that my idol Camacho is back. Now we can certainly fight for an Uefa Cup position.

THE PIANIST

"Pictures of Warsaw in 1945 resemble pictures of Hiroshima. Only a quarter of the city was still standing. Ninety per cent of all the large buildings had been reduced to rubble- Of the 1.3 million people who live in Warsaw in 1940, only 378.000 were still there. Almost two thirds of the city's population was either dead or missing." In Europe by Geert Mak
A movie to watch for those who like to think Europe is a civilized continent, or even a peaceful one. Some of the biggest mankind atrocities were committed in Europe or by Europeans. This continent always finds a way to inflame all sorts of hatred and disputes over religion, land, and culture, whatever. So much pettiness over so little land. And for the people who think it is different now I can only think of one word: Sarajevo. And another one come to think of it: Putin.

THE CRYING GAME

Humans keep doing the same mistakes because:
a) They’re stupid.
b) They’re stupid.
c) They’re stupid.
*see answer in next post.
Sometimes I just fucking wonder am I the only one on the planet who actually has feelings? Maybe I am the only one with wrong feelings. I’d love too say I’ve learned after this 2 day shock but I am human, and therefore stupid, and worst, half-fake blonde prone to masochist feelings so who knows? Anyway disappointments of the heart always give good Bridget Jones memoires!

Saturday 18 August

48 kgs. (but post-period), alcohol units 0.1 (I’m being a good girl), cigarettes 0 but in my mind 60 a day, calories 25424, male rejections 2 (uau in 24 hours even for me this is a very good mark), sips of diet coke 3 (just to remember the taste uhmmmmmmmm)

Food consumed today:
2 Gouda cheese slices
1 piece of Pierre Marcollini black Caribbean chocolate
1 chocolate cookie package (ups…)
1/10 Kriek
1 package of chips (ups…)
3 sips of diet coke

7PM. Brussels: my flat.
Ugh. The last thing on earth I feel like doing is going to run in Parc Cinquentenaire in about half an hour, but it’s a sacrifice I must do for art. The art of good thighs and ass to be more precise! Anyway what do they say on these Nike ads? No pain no gain? Or is it no sweat no gain? Anyway that’s bullshit because they’re always saying their tops are anti-sweat what is a contradiction in itself. In fact the best thing about running is that you appreciate being still a lot more. And anyway to quote whomever “the only reason I took up jogging is so I can hear heavy breathing again”. God. Sometimes I swear I just gain weight by breathing. And not the heavy type…
Anyway I have a strategy, I just tumble if I see a cute guy. Later on I’ll say if works.